Last week’s post was part 1 about the Parable of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32). I shared that we walk away from God – not the other way around; how we need to repent to return home, and the unconditional love of the Father. If you haven’t read last week’s post, I encourage you to do so before reading today’s.
Usually, when discussing this parable, a lot of attention is focused on the prodigal son and his father. But there is another important character in this story that is often overlooked. And I think Jesus wanted us to pay as much attention to him as to the others. Perhaps we have more to learn from this son than we want to admit.
While the younger son took his share of the inheritance and partied, traveled, and squandered his money, the older son stayed home and worked. In fact, the day his younger brother returned home, he was working in the field like he did every day. “Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. So, he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. ‘Your brother has come,’ he replied, ‘and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.’” (v 25-27)
What do you think the older brother did? Was he excited like his father? Did run to embrace his younger brother? Was he ready to break out his dance moves? Nope. “The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So, his father went out and pleaded with him. But he answered his father, ‘Look! All these years I’ve been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!’” (v 28-30)
I am sad to say, I can relate to his reaction. After all, don’t I do this in my own life more than I want to admit? When I unload the dishwasher. Again. When I clean up the dinner dishes. Again. When I make the phone calls to schedule doctors, exterminators, electricians. Again. When I pick up the slack because someone else dropped the ball. When I do the right thing, but the wrong people get rewarded. Again.
When all my work seems taken for granted. When I don’t feel appreciated. When I feel like no one sees all I do. When I feel invisible. In these moments, I can relate to the older brother’s resentment and anger and frustration. It is hard to see someone celebrated for doing what we know is wrong or for not doing what they should. Or for doing what we always do. It is easy to choose resentment and bitterness because our filter is comparison.
Comparison is such a dangerous pastime. We either won’t live up to the “perfect life” portrayed on social media or we will be disappointed by what we perceive lacking in someone else. If you are like me, your expectations of yourself are very high. So, you tend to judge others by those same unrealistic expectations. It is a recipe for disappointment, resentment, and rebellion. And it quickly leads to cries of “this isn’t fair.”
What the older brother was saying was just that, “This isn’t fair!” Ironically, he was just as self-centered as the younger brother he so harshly judged. He believed that since he had been obedient, he was entitled to his father’s money, property, and possessions. Just as the younger son felt he was due his inheritance. His mindset was like that of the legalistic Pharisees – following strict rules is what brings you to God.
His view was transactional. God’s view is relational.
His view was “If I do this. I will get that.” God’s view is “If you love me, I will bless you and love you beyond your wildest expectations.”
His view was that his younger brother’s actions were unforgivable. God’s view is, “I will die to save you so that all your sins will be forgiven.”
God wants us to be obedient because we love Him, not because it earns us favor. When we live our lives checking boxes of what we’ve done and comparing that to what others haven’t, we define our value and worth by what we accomplish. If we do more, we are more valuable. If we achieve more, we are superior. And “they” are less than, not good enough, lazy, inferior.
And we would be so very, very wrong.
In verse 31, the father says to the oldest son, “‘My son,’ the father said, ‘you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.’”
God loves us so much there is nothing He won’t do to draw us home. There is no sacrifice He hasn’t made for you. Yes, you! He will leave everyone to chase you down. You matter that much. There is nothing you can do to lose His love. And there is nothing you can do to earn your way into His home.
My worth. Your worth. It comes from one place and one place only. From the gracious, loving, forgiving, extravagant heart of the Father. He and He alone defines our worth. That is the beautiful message of the parable of the Prodigal Son. It is the message of Jesus. It is the message of open arms that carried your sins to the cross. It is the message of those same arms embracing you when you come home – no matter how messy or organized your path has been. And it is the message of celebration when our brothers and sisters come home.
Don’t view your relationship with God as a transaction. You are worth so much more to Him.
In what ways are you like the older son putting fairness above forgiveness? Do you keep a checklist? I encourage you this week to ask God to reveal those places in your heart that harbor resentment or bitterness. Ask for forgiveness and repent seeking to find your worth in Jesus Christ.