Feelings

Just saying that word makes some people uncomfortable.  Feelings are icky.  Feelings are complicated.  Feelings are for the weak.  Feelings are to be managed, even suppressed.  Men don’t cry.  Women are overly emotional.  You’ve heard it all.  And I’ll bet you’ve even uttered some of these words to yourself.  I certainly have.

“This isn’t the time or place.”

“You need to be strong.”

“If you trusted Jesus more, you wouldn’t feel this way.”

Oh, that last one.  Of all the lies I’ve spoken to my weary heart, that may be the most damaging.  I have lost count of the times I’ve punished myself for my human frailty.  When instead of embracing feelings and emotions, I turn them into measuring sticks of my faith.  And I always come up short.  

Several people close to me are facing difficult situations.   Personal growth, family members facing an uncertain medical diagnosis, releasing a relative with dementia to nursing care.  These are Godly women who love the Lord with all their hearts.  Yet I know that each has experienced moments of fear.  Moments of doubt.  Moments of anger.  Moments of inadequacy.  Moments of loneliness.  And if they are anything like me, I would guess there may have been a moment when they questioned their strength of their faith.  “If I trusted Jesus more…”

I think, too often, we focus solely on Jesus as Lord and forget Jesus as man.  Jesus had wisdom, insight, skill, and intelligence beyond those of ordinary men because He was sinless.  And, yet Jesus felt sadness, anger, compassion, and joy.   

Jesus wept.  (John 11:35; Luke 19:41; Hebrews 5:7-9). 

Jesus got angry. (John 2:13-16; Mark 3:5)

Jesus felt sadness and grief. (Luke 19:41) (Mark 3:5 (Mark 8:12)

Jesus felt distress (Matthew 26:37)

Even while suffering anguish and ridicule as His blood stained the cross on which He hung, He felt compassion: “Then Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing.’ And they cast lots to divide his clothing” (Luke 23:34).

Emotions are not the enemy.  They are a gift.  A gift we share with Jesus.  The Father created us with a capacity to feel that we might experience and appreciate the world He created for us.  That a child’s laughter would fill our heart.  That a friend’s tears would stir compassion.  That love would give us a glimpse of what awaits in the Father’s house.  That we would turn to Him for comfort.  That we would run to Him in celebration. 

Beloved, you are created to feel.  To feel the grief of the crucifixion and the joy of the resurrection.  Our feelings are not a measurement of our faith in Jesus, but rather stepping stones leading us to a closer relationship with Him.  Surrender doesn’t mean we don’t feel joy, sadness, anger.  Surrender means that in those moments when our feelings are overwhelming, when we feel we can’t possibly take another step, we take the nail-pierced hand of our Savior.  

And with each step we take, we learn to experience feelings without judgement.  To grow in certainty that the God who blessed us with the capacity to feel, will use those feelings to strengthen our faith and grow our capacity to serve.  

2 Corinthians 1:3-4 tells us, “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, ⁴who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves receive from God.”

Emotions are not a measuring stick of your faith.   They are a glorious reminder of God’s immense love for you.  Emotions knit us together.  They are the yarn that weaves our stories.  Stories filled with sadness, anger, frustration, joy, and love.  Stories that can only be created by a life lived and felt.

I pray that whatever you are facing, whether it be challenge or victory, you extend yourself grace.  Grace that mimics the grace of the cross.  Grace that reminds you that you are not capable of perfection.  Grace that reminds you that the journey you are on is built on one powerful, all-consuming emotion.  The love of a Father who desires you so much, that He sacrificed His son.  

A love we don’t deserve, but an emotion for which I am eternally grateful.