Expectations are funny things. They can excite you as you anticipate something wonderful or fun. Or they can weigh you down – weights of fear, inadequacy, impending failure, not living up, and letting others down. That’s where I am as I write this blog.
Last week, I shared a life-altering experience (https://simplyjoy.online/blog/jesus-as-friend/up-close-and-personal/); a personal touch from Jesus that will forever be entwined into my very fiber. When I go through times when I feel lost or scared or unheard, I will reach back to that moment of Amazing Grace; proof of my Father’s gracious and overwhelming love.
Since then, the blog and the story of what happened has been shared in the church in which it occurred, on my social media and others, and through friends sharing with friends. If you haven’t been to our Facebook page https://www.facebook.com/groups/987656282156585), please take a minute to do so and read about how the reach of that Amazing Grace moment touched not only me, but the worship team that morning. You’ll be astounded.
How do I follow up a moment like that? How do I write a blog that will touch others as that one did? How do I know what to say this week? I lay in bed last night pondering this very question; the only result I got was a poor night’s sleep and a headache. And today, as I sat outside soaking up a beautiful autumn day, eating my lunch in silence, praying, God simply said, “You don’t.”
His message was clear, this blog isn’t a competition with myself. It’s not a challenge to see if I can outdo last week’s post or reach more people. It was never intended to be that, and it is not my goal. I simply want to write what the Lord puts on my heart. And this week, worrying about expectations, I almost lost sight of that.
It wasn’t until I quieted my own mind and sat in silence, that I heard the voice of the Lord. “You don’t.” Psalm 62:5 tells us, “For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence, for my hope is from Him.” Tradition indicates that Psalm 62 was written by David as he experienced one of the greatest heartbreaks of his life; the rebellion of his son, Absalom. 2 Samuel 15:30 gives us an idea of how awful this experience was on David: “But David continued up the Mount of Olives, weeping as he went; his head was covered, and he was barefoot. All the people with him covered their heads too and were weeping as they went up.” David found out that not only had his son rebelled against him but had plotted to steal the throne. David also discovered that many of the people he trusted—his friends and court officials—conspired against him along with Absalom.
I suspect David had a lot of expectations; and I bet those who remained loyal had a lot of expectations of what they thought he should do. I wonder if, like me, he lay awake pondering what actions he should take before he finally found solace in silence. David knew that God would not abandon him. He trusted that God would fulfill His expectations for David’s life. David lived knowing that God would bring to fruition all that He had planned. Even when David didn’t understand, he knew.
Silence is powerful. And difficult. Sunday at church, our worship time was filled with the Holy Spirit. The praise rising to our Lord was moving. Such that after praying our Pastor felt led to call the church to silence. To just rest in the power of the Holy Spirit. For a full two minutes (I went back and watched the video) we worshipped in silence. Each one connecting with our Father. Try sitting for two minutes in silence. Don’t speak. Listen to the quiet. For in the quiet you hear His voice. You hear him say, “You don’t have to live up to expectations.” “You don’t have to be better to be loved.” “You don’t have to beat last week.” “You don’t have to live up to your worldly expectations.”
He will whisper, “You only need to love me and trust me.” The only expectation that matters is that we are living for Jesus. That we wake up each day and face each decision with the grace and love of Jesus. That we don’t drown in worldly expectations missing out on the living water of Jesus.
Expect Jesus to move in your life. Expect Jesus to show up. Expect Jesus to show you grace and mercy. Expect Jesus to love you. These are the expectations that will fill your heart and your life with excitement and joy.
This week, I encourage you to set a time for one minute. Pray for the Lord to speak to your heart. Sit in silence and trust in the Love of Jesus.